Jen smiles, sings, & shares.

March is only a few hours away.

Why do I feel like 2011 is going by so fast?!

It’s been a good month. Lots of healing, growing, and laughing.

(:

& I lay in bed listening to this:

Adele - Make You Feel My Love

The past two nights I had the honor of performing at UC Irvine as well as UC San Diego with a complete band; a bassist, keyboardist, drummer, electric guitarist, and an acoustic guitarist. Not only are they amazingly talented, but they are also some of the most humble and sacrificial friends I have.

Before asking them to be a part of my performances, I let them know ahead of time that I wouldn’t be able to compensate them what they rightly deserved due to my financial state. These guys were DOWN, CHARLIE BROWN to just help a sister out and to make some great music. As a complete band we only got to meet one night for 5 hours AND WE WORKED IT OUT.

BRYAN KEITH MALOLOT - keyboardist, producer, bg vocals, extroardinaire
BEN CLEMENT - baby brother (who’s taller than me), guitarist, bg vocals
MIKE JUNG - electric guitar monstarrrr!
JASON S LEE - drummer, keeper of the beat
LEO B - bombastic bassist.. with the most difficult unique last name.

I am greatly humbled by their hearts… their talents… their energy… their love for music. I seriously felt like the luckiest girl in the world to share the stage with them :) plus I felt like a musical pimp. dizaaang. You guys made the show!

I felt so blessed to be able to put on two performances in a row that we could walk away from happily. But the most beautiful thing of it all is that all of us love God and acknowledge that our gifts are useless if not to be used to glorify Him. I truly believe God put these individuals in my life in His awesome plan.

Before our performance at The Loft, we huddled together to reflect and to pray before our set. I literally was about to cry because I was so thankful for all the hard work they put into practicing and performing. God was with us, and always has been.. and always will be. I hope we have more opportunities to work together so we can continue to lift it all up to Him.

To those of you who were able to come out and support.. I thank you a thousand folds. Even to those of you who texted me/called me to wish me luck.. you encourage me to always work hard and move forward :)

Boston, I’m coming your way and I’m bringing baby brother Ben along with me.

All glory be to God. Amen.

Hey Everyone!

Since 2011 kicked off I’ve performed in Chicago at Northwestern University, but this weekend I’ll be hitting up two Southern California cities <3 I don’t have a Southern California show finalized as of yet so be sure to come through if you’re available! I’ll be performing with a full band for the first time with my original songs so it’s really exciting.

IRVINE, CA - 2/26/11

UCI - TAO Lantern Festival
Saturday, February 26 · 6:30pm - 9:30pm
This show will have a full band!
DETAILS HERE: http://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=173340222711160#!/event.php?eid=184850891546534

SAN DIEGO, CA - 2/27/11

UCSD - The Loft’s “Luminance”
Sunday, February 27 · 8:00pm - 11:00pm
This show will have a full band!
DETAILS HERE: http://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=161899560527927

Will I see you this weekend? :)

“Jenn you are earning your stripes right now. It’s all a part of growing up sis. Don’t be like me & let a lot of bitterness & hate guide you astray. Be happy that you have problems & you are being tested. These things will pass. Spend some time with God, He will speak to you. Honestly the way I see things.. You have been through some things that got your heart confused & angry. I think the Lord has let you try it your way & now He is trying to get your attention back to your first love, Him. Forgive & forget. You are precious Jenn, the bible says we are His daily delight. It’s time to start believing that again & know who handles your future. Love you :) “

- Brother Dearest BK <3

Praise the Lord, SERIOUSLY.

Everything worked out today… Starting with Philip saving me by changing my spare hella late in the night.. then I woke up for work thanks to my roommate Nick and Costco was very helpful, specifically Tanaka. He’s forever my homeboy now. I bought one tire ‘cause I’m ghetto like that and he helped me get my back left tire fixed too. He also let me know that my front left tire is gonna bust a pop soon because the wires are sticking out so I need to buy ANOTHER tire.. but he hooked it up with the back left one so he really is splendid.

Also, I love you Allyssa for covering 2:30 to 4:00 so last minute so that I could be home and wait in peace for the UPS guy.

Life can be chaotic, but there’s method to the madness.

Jesus, you are SUPREME.

This weekend was a fantastic kick off to moving forward and leaving the past.. behind.

I don’t think I’ve laughed, smiled, and have been this happy in a long time.

I’m in a good place.

For those of you who encourage me, bring joy, help me grow, and allow me to get comfortable in this place, please stay.

Others, you may continue on your own way.

In other news: I have a flat tire. Didn’t even drive this whole weekend. Hopefully costco can work its magic. Tomorrow I have work until 4PM and expecting my new phone to come in the mail. I hope everything works out. I think I will wear a pretty dress tomorrow just to be happy :) for myself.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY COLIN … you are the best. friend. <3

I’ve literally been sick consistently from December of 2010 to now.

I need to get myself better.

Please keep me in your prayers. I don’t know if I can take anymore of this.

One thing I learned just yesterday, was that you should never have to be alone, but everyone deals with demons differently. The ones that constantly need baby-sitting, never know their own strength. And the ones that refuse help are usually the ones that need it the most. So the only thing you really can do is just be there for them. Even if it means doing absolutely nothing at all.

Most of the time people don’t need advice, they just need to know you haven’t given up on them, or that they’re not alone. And when they’re ready to stop drowning themselves and swim back to shore, they’ll let you know so you can toss ‘em a life preserver.

And if they never do, just remember that “The only people you need in your life, are the ones that need you in theirs.”

From one of my favorite bloggers - girlsarethenewboys

Before I avidly wrote on this tumblr, I had another tumblr where I posted the most depressing things. The great things about blogging is that I could go back in time and re-live moments. Actually.. maybe that’s a horrible thing. The encouraging thing is that I recognize how immature I was. I know I still have a lot of growing up to do, but the importance is that I recognize how young & naive I was especially back then. I started that blog when I was 19.. now I’m 21, turning 22 this year. Basically my life is very different now. I’m in a different place. I need to step out of it all to look at it from the outside in. I read my old posts and thought “WOW you are so freaking depressing. WOW who are you???????” i was in a bad place. a bad bad bad place where I just dug a hole for myself and sat in it. It was so pitiful I had to delete them - couldn’t let all that negative energy just float around in the internet.

But even during these dark times there was a specific somebody who dealt with me through it all. These past couple of months I’ve been without them, but I know God had a plan all along.

It’s amazing what a couple months can do.

Thank you for loving me during those dark times. You know who you are. I hope you know if I knew any better I’d do things differently. I hope we both learned from it. Who knows what God has in store for us.

I now continue moving forward with a few more lessons under my belt.